Motherhood Without Filters: The Truth About My Kids' OOTD

Hey fellow moms! Inspired by the latest novel that I read, My Not So Perfect Life by Sophie Kinsella, I am starting a series of blog posts called Motherhood Without Filters. It's just me sharing my raw and authentic take on some parts of being a mom that are usually being augmented in social media.

Dressing up kids, especially girls, is exciting. 

I've been through several phases of it ever since my first daughter was born. There was a phase of only buying gender-neutral colored onesies, then there was the think pink season, to all dresses to no dresses (now).

Because we have been blessed to get clothes as gifts to the girls, and we get an endless supply of hand-me-downs from relatives, we rarely buy clothes for the two. But buying is just half the battle. From the moment Nash learned to choose her clothes, there has been a constant power struggle between us.

It usually starts out with me having an outfit planned out for her to wear, but it always ends up with her choosing what clothes to put on. With Kawaii, it's still easy because she's only two years old. 

On the rare occasion that they actually like to pose. Quick story on this photo, their jackets are also hand me downs from their boy cousins in the US. They lent us these coats because it was too cold for the girls. Now it looks like the girls wore something edgy on purpose.

On the slim chance that I get to pick, here are two rules that I adhere to in dressing my kids up:

1. They should always be comfortable. My daughters are not fans of the phrase "tiis-ganda." Even if they would look smashing in it, they are not to wear those frilly dresses or cute denim jumpers on a humid day,  and we eventually cut all the tags inside our kids clothes because it makes them feel itchy.

2. Dress them up as kids. My brother once told me, "Wag mo pagsuotin si Nash ng mga pang-dalaga na. (Don't dress Nash up like a teenager)" It's actually sensible advice. When she's all grown up, she's free to experiment on trends, but right now, she'll dress up as a little princess - if she wants to. She can be as playful and as colorful as she wants with her outfits. I don't want her looking like a miniature adult in earth tones just so she would look hip, and people would think I'm a cool mom.

So this is what they usually wear, aka their OOTD on a regular basis:

• Pastel-colored sando tops from Divisoria (3 for 100, if I'm not mistaken). Breezy enough to be worn at home, or can be dressed up with pants, shorts or a tutu skirt.   
  
•   My kids have taken to their father in the sense that the most expensive item in their wardrobe is their footwear. Since we hardly buy any clothes for the girls, we buy them nice comfortable shoes. Nash loves her Mini Mels (I buy from Applesandpopcorn on Instagram) so I get her one or two pairs and she uses it for the whole year, and their Lola also buys them Crocs for everyday wear. Lately, she's been pairing it with everything. Good quality shoes are a worthy investment for us, since Kawaii can wear the shoes when her big sister outgrows it.
• Garterized dresses. My mom buys these cute little dresses for the girls from Divi or a bazaar stall in SM. She gets it for 50 to 100 pesos and it comes in different designs. Kawaii looks like a doll when she wears them. Nash isn't too keen about wearing dresses lately so she pairs her tops with shorts or leggings, also from the same supplier. 
  
• Character shirts. My Little Pony, Trolls and a whole lot of Frozen (shirts, leggings, hoodies!). Because, why not? Just let them be kids. 
• Hand-me-downs. We're lucky our relatives have such a good eye for fashion ;) I happily wore hand me downs from my aunts when I was a kid, until I turned 12 and grew taller than all of them and my feet was bigger than theirs. I let my girls wear pre-loved clothes for the reason that kids grow up so quickly and at the rate they're going, my girls will probably be like me.

Twinning is always cute. Wearing pretty preloved clothes from their aunts.

I must admit, I still consider myself a fashion mom. I have a Pinterest board named "My Girl's Lookbook," where I keep track of nice dresses, shirts with catchy phrases (I'm a sucker for those) and outfits that I fancy for my daughters. I also follow some moms on Instagram who sell cute outfits for kids. I actually admire those women who have turned their penchant for their children's fashion into a profitable business.

But as with everything, I think of the message that I'm sending to my girls. Do I imply that they need to dress a certain way for them to be liked and accepted? That we give much emphasis on their looks and outer appearance? At the same time, I don't want them to think that they can get away with being sloppy and messy and not taking care of their bodies. 

As a mom, my goal is not for my daughters to land a spot in a "10 Kids Who Dress Better Than You" spread. I'd like to think I still have the advantage, what with dressing myself up for the past 30 years and knowing that plain tops go with printed bottoms and vice versa, at least for five more years. 

My goal is to teach my kids to express themselves through their clothing. And that they should always be comfortable in what they wear.  

I used to put too much pressure on my daughter to wear the clothes I laid out for her, especially on special occasions, but now I learned to give in and accept when she resists my choices. I also learned to respect them when they refuse to pose for a decent #OOTD shot (picking my battles, they call it).

But, as nicely summarized by an essay from blogger Lauren Jimeson, "What My Kids Wear (or Don't Wear) Is None of Your Business." Just keep in mind that we want our kids' clothes to reflect who they are, not who we are, or how we want other people to see us.